In January of 2020, I signed divorce papers. At 28 years old, I was hitting my first divorce before some people’s first marriage. In 2021, I quit the job that was draining my will to live, completely abandoning a “traditional work day” all together. In 2022, I walked hand in hand with the love of my life, but everyone else’s world’s seemed to be crashing down. In 2023, I began shedding a layer of myself that was holding onto the past. Now, we’re cruising into 2024, and in the words of Kobe Bryant, this year’s about “Mamba Mentality”.
Kobe calls Mamba Mentality an approach to attacking life head on, being passionate and not quitting. If we’ve learned anything in 2023, it was that we have to do exactly that. We no longer can afford to wait for somedays, full bank accounts, or fully achieved resolutions. We’re living in a world that has gone through three years of darkness, and it’s time we move towards a mentality where we stop letting other people’s expectations become our focus for our reality.
Let me specify this here a little bit… I don’t think we should throw goals, expectations, or having a drive to achieve something out the window. I definitely think the opposite; You should be chasing every single real goal you have for yourself, as long as YOU WANT IT. I feel that some of the goals that people choose in life, tend to skew on how they’re going to be perceived, and not actually how they feel or what they want.
For example, someone working 60+ hours a week for years, tends to climb their corporate ladder. They abandon their hobbies, stop focusing on relationships, and forget what shows, foods, and activities they enjoy. Often times, there is the consistent reminder that they give themselves, that they want to be at the top. They’ll have achieved their dreams once their families are happy, their friends are proud, and their enemies are jealous. All of this time spent chasing this goal that was created because you thought you had to, while telling yourself that you’re accomplishing everything you set out to. Yet when you look at it from the outside, it looks like someone who created a cycle of working hard and losing parts of themselves, thinking that checking items off an internal checklist will make them the best version of themselves. Instead, they’re not even the person they began as.
When I think of Mamba Mentality, it’s not just the mindset of “all or nothing”, never give up, inspirational quotes that you see other people attribute to it. Instead, I see it as more of, “you are the most important thing to yourself. How can you focus on building YOU in order to be so happy and whole and successful that you’re able to share that with others?” Once you realize that fulfilling YOU is what actually is going to change the world around you, everything changes.
Having Mamba Mentality (Jen’s Version) in terms of 2024, would look like this:
- Being unapologetic about using every single hour of your PTO.
- Quitting your job for quite literally any reason. and going to part time work or work that isn’t “career based” to pay bills, while you figure out life.
- Not texting back if you don’t have anything to say.
- Learning to be content and enjoy doing nothing.
- Creating a portion of your budget to include self care as a non-negotiable. (Whether it’s a Reese’s PB cup every week at the grocery store, or a biweekly nail appointment, finding a way to treat yourself while doing what’s expected of you helps make life less heavy)
- Not apologizing for the way you spend the money you make.
- Making time for a nap when you feel tired, because that means your body needs it. (and not thinking there’s “something else you need to do”)
Mamba Mentality can fit in your life, even if you aren’t the basketball GOAT.
(Okay, hold on for a second. I know what you’re thinking…. Is Jen’s fiancĂ© forcing her to type this? Because he’s obsessed with Kobe, and this isn’t on brand for her. This is indeed a false statement, and through being forced to endure countless statistics and fun facts, I’ve realized that Kobe was a good guy, and that Mamba Mentality can go beyond just a sport)
I think the most important thing to do as we’re going through 2024 is to really just believe the weird manifestation mindset that your spiritual girlies on TikTok tell you about. In essence, it’s the white girl’s Mamba Mentality. It’s that belief that whatever you put your mind to, you will achieve, and that nothing’s going to stand in your place except your own brain. I also know that telling you to manifest your best life through a basketball player’s life mantra is so much easier said than done. Telling you to keep pushing, create boundaries, live with your head held high, is so easy to say. But!!!! I’m hoping knowing that I’m going to try do it with you shows you I’m putting my money where my mouth is.
Listen, I’m in credit card debt, living in a rental that had a water leak last week, trying to survive the world with mental health issues, and being verbally abused by a 12 year old daily. The number on the scale hasn’t changed for years, I’m in a fight with my fascia, Mack snores really loud, Harper literally wishes she could wear me as skin, and then cries when she can’t. I don’t have a whole bunch of Mamba Mentality oozing from my pores. But, it’s in me. Back in 2020 when I was the spiritual girly, and talking to rocks, I was getting every single thing I was putting my mind to. Simply because I believed I deserved it and didn’t settle until I had it.
We’re in this together. 2024, our resolutions, adopting Mamba Mentality, and just surviving the shit show that is “America”… All of the things we’re going to encounter this year can either be approached the way you have been, or the way Kobe always did. I’m not asking you to push yourself outside of your comfort zone, I’m just asking you to train your brain to focus on what you want, and don’t stop thinking about it or working for it until you get it. But only if it’s something you want for your life. It’s your year, happy 2024.